Methinks I just like to waste time compiling lists that I’ve already posted before and making collages. Methinks I need to attend a Procrastinators Anonymous meeting.
June 2009
Posted in Books, Polyvore, Romance, Young Adult | Tags: June 2009, what I read
Big news! Christopher Pike’s Last Vampire series receives a cover makeover.
Before…
After…
The first edition, Thirst No. 1 includes 3 novels: The Last Vampire, Black Blood, Red Dice.
The second edition, Thirst No. 2 includes: Phantom, Evil Thirst, Creatures of Forever.
Release date: August 4, 2009.
While I’ve read my share of Pike in the ’90’s, I haven’t read his Last Vampire series. Frankly, I’m a little over the entire vampire YA craze, but it’s Pike, folks! I guess I could squeeze in one more vamp book before I put the ban on vamps altogether.
Posted in Books, Horror, Young Adult | Tags: christopher pike, Cover Art, cover art makeover, vampires, YA
New Moon Posters
OR
In my opinion: Jacob. Despite that lame tribal tattoo on his arm (he sooooo did NOT have tats in the novel! Or maybe he did. Maybe I just didn’t want to believe it… ), he’s got hip dips and dangerously low-riding jeans.
Edward, what’s up with the jacket? Now is not the time to be shy. Show us your vamp titties!
There ya go…
More half-naked men.
Because I’m a self confessed perv, this looks like a gang rape waiting to happen.
Posted in Books, Library Loot, Young Adult | Tags: Edward Cullen, Jacob Black, New Moon Posters
1. Dream Girl by Lauren Mechling
2. Tender Morsels by Margo Lanagan
3. Wings by Aprilynne Pike
Also…
I don’t think this qualifies as a ‘Flavor of the Week’ so I dub it my ‘mini flavor of the weekend’: How much do I love Emma Watson’s photoshoot in the new Teen Vogue? I covet this wardrobe. Problem is, So. Cal’s dress code consists of flip flops and distressed denim; people would look at me funny if I strutted around in chiffon.
Posted in Books, Library Loot, Media, Polyvore, Pop Culture | Tags: dream girl, emma watson, Library Loot, teen vogue, tender morsels, wings by aprilynne pike
In which I dump my latest collage backlog (April to present) for your viewing pleasure…
In the process, you’ll discover more about me, maybe more than you want to know…
Posted in Books, Media, Polyvore, Pop Culture | Tags: polyvore
My boyfriend informs me that I have a new obsession every week, hence, my ‘Flavor of the week.’ Familiar readers of my blog will know about my ‘Sweep the Leg’ challenge or my ‘Wuthering Heights’ phase. Said flavors are usually intense at the beginning of the week and tend to dissipate at week’s end.
To recap, boyfriend has taken measures to document my ‘Flavor of the week’ on his calender. I’ve taken measures to document it here…
Starting with the movie Bright Star (2009), the soon-to-be released biopic of 19th century poet John Keats.
Look at the luscious screen caps! Did I ever tell you about my star-crossed lovers fetish? Or my Victorian Romance fetish? Or my Ben Whishaw fandom? This movie is like a stew or salad or casserole (insert your own food simile) of all my favorite ingredients!
Posted in Books, Media | Tags: Ben Whishaw, Bright Star, Flavor of the week
May 2009
June 2009
Posted in Books, Memes | Tags: Books, Books read
1. Those Who Went Remain There Still—Cherie Priest
2. Wuthering Heights—Emily Bronte
3. Evermore—Alyson Noel
4. I Heart You, You Haunt Me—Lisa Schroeder
My library loot posts always suck. Creating that Polyvorian masterpiece you see above is not exactly like painting the Sistine Chapel, but it’s pretty close. I’d like to see Michaelangelo tackle Polyvore. He thinks he can master any medium? I bet Michael the Mofo can’t handle Polyvore!
Also, linking. Do you know how many windows I had to open to link these books? Too many. Too many. For this reason, my library loot posts are extremely text-Spartan. In an attempt to beef up my future posts, I’m going to include random bits of crap asides from my everyday life starting with…
My brilliant idea to improve my library. I love my library. It has everything—the latest books, DVDs, free bookmarks, mags, computers, snarky yet judgemental library aides—but one thing it lacks is MEN. Sexy MEN that I can borrow on a 7-day loan.
God, my mind is a scary place; my neurons fire on a diet of books, chocolate, and man love. I’m starting to think that deep down, I really want to follow my dreams and become a pimp. Case in point: I’m seriously considering reupholstering my car interior in leopard.
In America, when you’re a pimp, you have POWER. I’ll rule over my Man-Hoes and He-Bitches with an iron hand! I’ll discipline my pretties with my skull cap pimp cane if they get out of line. If they back-sass Da Masta (Hi, that’s me), I’ll slap them He-Bitches silly with my purple leopord skin glove or whip them raw with my riding crop. I got the riding crop idea from Philippa Gregory’s Wideacre. Everything I need to know about being a pimp I learned from books. You would think reading would curb my desire to be a pimp. You would be WRONG! (See, I told you my mind was a scary place. Depending on the perversity of your own mind, you can either pity or envy my boyfriend).
If twisted girls like me ran the world, our libraries would become male brothels. You go to the library, browse the shelves for the lastest reads, browse the red light aisle for the MEN.
Sexxyyy
Dashing
Slow mo fog swagger
European male.
Cougar bait
The King. This one is worth the late fee.
I could keep going, but I don’t want to appear greedy.
This is my mind…
It’s a Bacchanal Carnivale.
That devious picture of JRM as Henry VIII is me. Replace the three big boobie wenches with three Gaspards in Regency breeches and that’s pretty much a snap shot of everything I strive for in life.
Posted in Books, Library Loot, Polyvore, Pop Culture | Tags: Gaspard Ulliel, Library Loot
Dear Sweet Merciful Christ! Someone keep Superman away from that little boy!
No matter how many times I look at this, it never gets old.
If you don’t know about Judge a Book by its Cover, you don’t know what you’re missing. This is by far my favorite cover. I’m tempted to save it as my wallpaper…naw, people might think I’m a perv. I’ll stick to my original inconspicuous wallpaper.
Sexxxyyy.
Posted in Books, Media, Miscellaneous, Pop Culture | Tags: Gaspard Ulliel, Judge a book by its cover, Superman
For the past two days, I’ve been telling all my co-workers to “Sweep the Leg” as in:
“You think your no good boyfriend is two-timing you with some skank Ho he met on Facebook?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Why put up with it? Sweep the leg, dawg. Sweep the leg!”
Okay, I might have ghettofied that conversation for no apparent reason other than I can. The point is, I’ve been poking everyone in the elbow and telling them to “Sweep the Leg.” Naturally, all I get in return are blank stares as friends, family, and co-workers alike collectively scratch their scalps, no doubt baffled by this week’s whatthefuckery.
Sweep the leg=show no mercy.
The phrase is derived from the greatest ’80’s teen flick of all time: The Karate Kid.
Coined by this man:
The evil Cobra Kai sensei…
To this skeleton-suit donning douche bag (Who I always thought was kinda hot. God help me, I have an affinity for assholes. And I just realized that sounds so wrong on so many levels):
To take out Daniel-sans’ injured leg.
Little did he know, Daniel-sans’ got a secret weapon…
The deadliest art of the Orient: Preying Mantis.
He only needs one leg, you dirty Cobra-Kai bastards!
I’m trying to bring “Sweep the Leg” back into usage. If you’re reading this, you should find a creative way to tell someone you know in real life to “Sweep the Leg.” You’ll feel self-important afterward. Like you made a difference. Like you had a hand in the creation of the ultimate cool.
For those of you who have never seen The Karate Kid. For shame! Here is “Sweep the Leg” in action. Watch it. Learn from it.
An aside: I can’t stop staring at Evil Sensei’s chin dimple. I want to stick my finger in it and wiggle wiggle. He’ll likely snap my finger like the sapling twig of a bonsai tree, but it’ll be worth it. Evil Chin Cleft Bastard! Reminds me of my P.E. teacher who gave me a C in P.E. because I “did push-ups like a sissy girl.” To which I exclaimed: “I am a girl! I’m not built to withstand this kind of strenuous physical activity! “
I hate P.E. I hate soccer balls, footballs, volleyballs, baseballs, tetherballs, tennis balls; I’ve been hit with every single ball known to man…in the face, in the gut, in the groin (I’m grateful I’m not a boy. If you punch a girl in the groin, she feels nothing! HA!), on the butt. I loathe P.E.
Here I wonder what this post has to do with books. Time to make a far-fetched Lit Connection.
The Karate Kid is the ultimate YA novel in movie form. Its got everything: a sensitive hero, bullies, a romance, a token Asian mentor who kicks ass and takes names. For this reason, whenever I read a John Green novel (Looking for Alaska, Paper Towns, etc…), I immediately envision Ralph Macchio as the main character. John Green, you know KK is your favorite movie. I bet you own the Criterion Collection. If in your 4th novel, you incorporate a wise Asian mentor, I wouldn’t be surprised.
Posted in Media, Miscellaneous, Pop Culture, Young Adult | Tags: sweep the leg, The Karate Kid
